Behind most great men's groups is one man who decided his community needed one, and did something about it. If you're considering starting a new men's group, you're likely already aware of how much men in your community could benefit from a regular space to connect, be honest, and support each other. The good news is you don't need to start from scratch.
New Zealand Men's Group Network have put together a set of resources specifically designed to help men get a new group off the ground.
Understand what a men's group is and how it works
Before starting a group, it helps to be clear on what you're actually creating and what makes a men's group different from a social gathering or a support group. Our About page covers the purpose, format, and benefits of men's groups in detail, and is a good starting point for anyone new to this work. We've also written a more in-depth post on what a men's group is and what actually happens in one which is worth reading as a comprehensive overview, but in a slightly different format. Both cover common questions like:
- Who men's groups are for
- How a men's group differs from therapy
- What men typically experience over time
- What to expect from a first visit
It's also important to understand what a men's group is not. Please read our detailed post on how men's groups differ from therapy, church groups, AA, Men's Sheds, and other male spaces.
Follow proven guiding principles
Every group listed on our network follows a set of core principles developed and refined over 25+ years of men's group experience in New Zealand. These cover:
- Confidentiality and trust
- Commitment and attendance
- Feedback, challenge, and accountability
- Personal responsibility and safety
- Group autonomy and structure
We'd encourage any new group to adopt these principles from the start, or at least use them as a framework to develop your own.
Read the men's group guiding principles
Use our sharing circle topics as a resource
A common challenges new groups face is knowing what to talk about, particularly in the early months before men have built enough trust to share freely. Our sharing circle topics page offers more than 125 questions and prompts across five major areas of men's experience:
- Who I am — identity, masculinity, values
- Inner world — anxiety, triggers, vulnerability
- Relationships — patterns, friendship, family, intimacy
- How I engage — communication, conflict, honesty, boundaries
- Purpose & growth — passions, work, legacy, big questions
Use them freely, and adapt them to suit your group.
Browse sharing circle topics & questions
Consider facilitator training
Starting and running a men's group well takes more than good intentions. It takes skill, patience, and a willingness to model the kind of openness you want to see in others. Facilitator training workshops run each year in both North and South Island locations, and are a great way to:
- Build confidence in holding and facilitating a circle
- Learn from experienced men's group facilitators
- Connect with others doing this work around New Zealand
View upcoming events and facilitator trainings
Get your group listed
Once your group is up and running, we'd love to list it on the site so other men in your area can find it. Listing is free, and helps ensure men across Aotearoa know where to look when they're ready to join a group.
If you have questions about starting a group or want to talk through the process, feel free to get in touch. We're always happy to help.
Are you truly ready to do this?
For a more detailed guide on how to actually get a group started, read our post on how to start a men's group.
