Some men's groups find topics or guiding questions helpful to enrich the circle. They can encourage deeper sharing, especially when things feel flat or when men run out of things to say. Topics may arise naturally as men share, or they can be introduced intentionally.
Here are some topics to try:
Who I am
Identity & story
- Who am I?
- What is my life story?
- How do I see myself and my life?
- What key moment changed my life — for better or worse?
Masculinity
- What does being a man mean to me?
- Where did I learn my ideas about manhood?
- Do I feel pressure to perform masculinity?
Body & health
- How do I feel about my body?
- Do I take care of my physical health, or ignore it?
- What health fears do I carry but rarely talk about?
- How is my body changing as I age, and how do I feel about that?
Values & how I live
- Do I live by my values?
- When do I fall short of them?
- Do my values bring me pride, conflict, or isolation?
Inner world
Anxiety & negativity
- What am I anxious about?
- Why do I struggle with things others seem to find easy?
- What do I fear will happen if my worries come true?
- What triggers rumination, negative thinking, or depression?
- What does the voice in my head say?
- How do I handle negative self-talk?
- Do I self-sabotage with pessimism or doubt?
Triggers
- What triggers me to react poorly?
- How much control do I lose when triggered?
- What makes me angry — or sends me into a rage?
Vulnerability
- What do I least want to talk about?
- What am I most ashamed of, or afraid to say aloud?
- Are there things about myself I'm afraid to share with my partner?
Addiction & escapism
- Do I use alcohol, substances, porn, gambling, or screens to escape?
- What am I avoiding when I reach for them?
- Has escapism cost me something important?
- What would my life look like without these crutches?
Expectations vs. reality
- What are my expectations in life?
- Are they realistic?
- Do I set myself up for disappointment by expecting too much?
- Am I a perfectionist? In what ways?
Relationships
Relationship patterns
- What patterns keep showing up in my relationships?
- What do they have in common — same frustrations, same type of partner, same reasons for break-ups?
- What resentments am I carrying from past or current relationships?
- What do I think I'm like as a partner?
- How do past or current partners actually see me?
Friendship & brotherhood
- Do I have close male friends?
- How do I show up for other men?
- Do I feel more isolated or more connected in my life?
Father
- What was my father like? How did he raise me?
- What shaped our relationship, and how does it influence me now?
- Have I forgiven him or let go of his influence?
- In what ways am I like him — and how do I feel about that?
- In what ways am I trying to be different than my father?
Mother
- What was my mother like? How did she raise me?
- Was my mother nurturing? Was she critical of me?
- Have I forgiven her or let go of her influence?
- How do aspects of my mother show up in my relationships with other women?
- What is my mother's lasting impact on my life?
Parenting
- What do I need to clean up in my relationship with my children?
- How do I interact with my adult children?
- What do I struggle with when parenting younger children?
- How has having children changed me?
Intimacy & sex
- Am I comfortable with intimacy — emotional or physical?
- Do I confuse sex with love or closeness?
- Do I feel my intimate needs are being met?
- Where do shame, fear, or insecurity show up in my sex life?
- Am I open-hearted, or do I tend to keep emotional distance?
How I engage
Communication
- Do I communicate my feelings and needs clearly?
- Do I feel heard and understood?
- Do I listen well — or am I always judging or thinking of what to say next?
- Am I open to different points of view?
- Do my conversations often turn into arguments?
Conflict
- How do I deal with conflict?
- Do I avoid it, get angry, escalate, or try to win?
- Do I feel bulldozed in conflict?
- Do I fear the worst will happen?
Trust
- When do I lose trust in others?
- Why do I struggle to trust in the first place?
- What fears come up when I don't trust?
Honesty & lying
- Do I lie? Why?
- When and about what do I lie?
- What are the consequences of my dishonesty?
- What happens when I choose not to lie?
Boundaries
- Do I have strong boundaries?
- Where are my boundaries too weak?
- How do I react when they're crossed?
- What do I fear when I enforce them?
Criticism
- How do I react to criticism?
- Do I get defensive or angry?
- Do I feel ashamed or diminished?
Asking & receiving
- Do I ask for help when I need it?
- Do I make my needs known to others?
- Can I receive love and praise? How does it make me feel?
- Do I prefer to give rather than receive — and what does that say about me?
- What am I afraid of when receiving love or praise?
Social media & technology
- How does social media affect how I see myself?
- Do I compare myself to others online?
- Am I present in my relationships, or distracted by screens?
- Do I use technology to connect or to avoid connecting?
Purpose & growth
Passions & pride
- What are my passions? What do they say about me?
- What am I proud of — and why?
- Which of my traits or values am I most proud of?
Achievements & regrets
- What have I done right in my life?
- What are my biggest achievements? Am I proud of them?
- What are my biggest regrets? What have I learned from them?
Work & purpose
- How do I feel about my work or career?
- Does it give me meaning, or just pay the bills?
- What would I do if money weren't an issue?
Money & security
- What is my relationship with money?
- Do I feel secure or anxious about finances?
- Do I tie my self-worth to financial success?
Persistence
- Am I persistent in my pursuits?
- What keeps me going?
- Why do I give up?
Big questions
Spirituality & meaning
- Do I have a spiritual life or practice?
- Do I feel connected to something larger than myself?
- What enhances or reduces my feeling of connection to something larger?
- Do I find meaning in the everyday, or does life feel empty or purposeless?
Death & suicide
- Am I afraid of death?
- Have I faced moments where I thought I might die? How did that feel?
- Have I had thoughts of suicide? How do I feel about that?
- How do I respond when someone else shares suicidal thoughts?
Forgiveness & letting go
- Who have I not forgiven?
- What does holding onto resentment cost me?
- What would it take to let go?
Ageing & legacy
- How do I feel about getting older?
- What do I want my legacy to be?
- What impact do I want to leave behind?
Gratitude
- What am I grateful for right now?
- Do I express gratitude often enough?
- How would my life change if I focused more on gratitude?
What's missing? If you have any additional topic ideas please contact us and let us know.
If you're thinking about starting a group, see our practical guide for getting started.
